An Interesting Afternoon Routine

During the school week, we have a pretty set routine. The oldest is in school, the middle one is in MDO twice a week and the baby is always attached at my hip. As part of this routine, everyone gets piled into the car twice a day for our drive thru the carpool lane. This is, perhaps, my least favorite part of the day. In the morning it is a mad rush, in the afternoon everyone is tired and grouchy. The afternoon also has another added bonus ... it's booty stretchin time!

Wait, let me explain ...

Our afternoon goes something like this:
Me: "Little Man, are you about ready to go get Diva? You need to go potty and then head to the car." *this is met with varying degrees of resistance, but Momma always gets her way in the end*
We then head out for our 3 minute drive to the school.
Maybe because she is my first baby in school, maybe because I have a bit of OCD or maybe a combination of both, we arrive shortly before 3p.m. - school gets out at 3:15.
This leaves us a few minutes sitting in the car.
It doesn't matter what else is going on - happily watching a DVD, singing at the top of his lungs to the radio or throwing a fit like only he can - it always happens just like clockwork.

At exactly 3:00, I hear it:
"MY BOOTY'S STRETCHING!"

This is Little Man speak for needing to use the bathroom. Seriously?!?! You just went to the bathroom five minutes ago!!! We do this everyday, at this exact same time!!! This isn't a new routine!!!

What ensues is a panic of sorts. It would be funny if it wasn't so loud. Of note, he was never had an accident sitting in the carpool line. Interestingly enough, there isn't even a mad dash for the bathroom when we arrive back home. So, being the good momma that I am ...

I crank up the radio and wait for the moment to pass

So, what do you do in the carpool lane?

Steve

I am not often surprised by something my kids say. Amused or even embarassed at times, but rarely surprised. We recently had an exception to the rule.

I headed out to run errands with the boys safely buckled in the backseat, Laurie Berkner playing in the background. Little Man loves to talk while we are riding, but he also wants the music playing. This presents a problem to his mother. A fair bit of hearing loss is done no favors by background noise and not being able to see the speaker face-to-face. As a result, I typically hear bits and pieces of what he says - enough to agree or disagree and get the basic idea of what is being said.

This is what I heard today:
Little Man: " What's that in the sky?"
Me: "Fog" (gotta love those warm, muggy afternoons)
Little Man: "Fog is kinda like steve."
Me: "Yeah, kinda."
Little Man: "You know, Dad likes steve in his shower?"
Me: "What?" *turning radio down*
Little Man: "Daddy likes steve in his shower."
Me: "You mean STEAM? Daddy likes STEAM?:
Little Man: "Yeah, STEVE."

Note to self: work on clear pronounciations with the three-year-old ...
and question the husband about Steve!

Why We Don't Have Guests

We rarely have guests for dinner. It isn't a conscious decision, it just doesn't seem to happen often. Today provided a bit of insight as to why this may be the case. Today we had a dinner guest. Our beloved Kiki had dinner at the K house ...
and she may never return.

Tonight's dinner was like most others. I didn't prepare spaghetti-o's, fish sticks, cheese sandwiches or some other item considered one of the major food groups by the under six crowd. What I did prepare contained meat and clearly identifiable vegetables. Not surprisingly, it was not given a warm welcome upon it's arrival to the table.

It went something like this:
Diva: "What's this?"
Me: "Dinner"
Diva: "But I don't like it!"
Me: "Do you know what it is?"
Diva: "No, but I don't like it!"
Me: "Have you tasted it?"
Diva: "No, but don't like it!"
Me: "How do you know if you don't like it? You don't know what it is and you haven't tasted it!"
Diva: "I'm not eating it!"
Me: *insert basic "Mom" lecture here - you have to at least taste it, nothing else if you don't eat your dinner, etc,*
Diva then took the smallest bite possible ... and promptly puked it back into her plate.
It should be noted that Kiki was sitting beside Diva, no doubt the best view of all the action.

So, who wants to come to dinner at the K house?